If you’ve ever gone through a breakup, you might understand how difficult it can be to start dating immediately after you had a breakup.
This is because you are currently going through a different rush of emotions at the same time.
If you never truly loved your ex or invested in the relationship, moving on as quickly as possible might not be easy.
So the question is, when is the best time to start dating after a breakup? Although many people rush into a relationship immediately after their breakup with their ex, this could mean two things: either they are using that as a coping mechanism, or they never loved their ex.
If you’ve gone through a difficult breakup and you’re seeking to start dating all over again, then you should read this blog post till the end.
How To Start Dating After A Breakup
1. Take Time to Heal
Healing is a process. It takes time.
A fresh wound does not close up immediately; it goes through different stages of healing before it completely closes up.
This is expected of a fresh breakup experience.
After a fresh breakup, it is not healthy to hop on the next person that comes your way and make a relationship out of it.
Just like the injury time during a football match, there is a time of vulnerability that everyone experiences immediately after a breakup.
A vulnerable time is a time when a person has not healed from a broken relationship. During this time, we are often driven to look for an at-all-cost means to fill up the void, not considering the consequences of our actions.
This is a very dangerous thing to do.
Take time to heal before you enter into another relationship.
Don’t ignore how you feel or live in denial of your feelings; rather, acknowledge it and take your time. When you take time to thoroughly heal, you’ll find it easy in your next relationship and not have a spillover.
2. Rediscover Yourself
Sometimes a breakup can make you lose yourself, losing your sense of identity. So while you’re healing, focus on rediscovering yourself.
Daily affirmations will help build your self-esteem again.
Not just that, rediscover your passion, find a sense of purpose, and give yourself to personal growth by exposing yourself to new things.
Do things that give you joy and make you feel fulfilled. Of course, you’re made for more than romantic relationships.
As a matter of fact, when you sink yourself in your passion, it’s easy for you to love all over again.
3. Know What You Want
When you don’t have a clear stand on what you really want for yourself, you will be a victim of whatever comes your way.
A vision gives you direction and makes it easy for you to choose.
It is best to take time to think, meditate, and reflect on what you want. After some deep reflection, get clear on what you’re looking for in a future partner.
What do you want in a new partner?
What can you do better? What was the cause of the breakup, and what can you do better? This will help guide your decisions and ensure that you are dating for the right reasons.
4. Start Slow
There’s a subtle excitement that comes with being in a new relationship, but it’s advisable not to rush into a relationship.
Begin by getting to know the person you met casually, whether through social media, dating apps, or mutual friends.
Build friendship and take your time knowing the new person through and through. Don’t feel pressured to rush into the relationship all to show your ex that you’ve gotten into a relationship.
Take your time to know the new person and be sure that you want them. Starting out this way allows you to build a solid foundation for the relationship without feeling pressured.
5. Embrace the Fun
One of the ways to get yourself out and move on from your last relationship is by making intentional efforts to let go of the old and explore the new. Remember that dating is supposed to be fun!
Enjoy the process of meeting new people, discovering new things, exploring shared interests, and having lighthearted conversations.
Go out with your friends, try out new hobbies you’ve never explored. Don’t let past baggage weigh you down.
6. Be Honest About Your Past
Whatever you try to cover up has the power to hold you down. Rather than trying to cover up things and allowing the nemesis of your past to catch up with you, open up and be free.
Whenever you feel the need to open up, be honest about your past relationship. Sharing your story can build trust and show vulnerability.
But it’s important to get through and not dwell on the past—focus on who you are now and what you are looking for in the future.
7. Stay Open-Minded
Nothing feels less or inadequate until it is compared. Comparison is the killer of authenticity.
Everyone is different, and unique in their own way, so that pre-informs you that your new partner will not be an incarnate of the former, i.e., he may not look or act like your ex.
Stay open to new experiences and perspectives about life, and don’t compare your past relationship to a new one.
Remember, everyone brings something unique to the table.
8. Trust Your Instincts
Your instinct gives you a headlight on things. It could come as a pleasant or, sometimes, an unpleasant feeling.
When you begin to feel off about something, that is your instinct at work, signaling a red light.
When deciding if someone is right for you, listen to your gut. If you feel a connection, explore it, but if something does not feel right, do not hesitate to walk away.
9. Don’t Rush to Label It
It’s not a do-or-die affair. Take it slow. Take your time to know what you really want, take time to observe, and take time to learn.
It could be tempting to rush things and label a relationship early on. Take your time to truly get to know someone before deciding if they are a long-term match.
Labeling puts you under pressure and makes you turn a blind eye to things that you need to observe about the new relationship.
Not just that, it makes you more prone to other hurt. Do not rush; take it one step at a time.
If they’re just friends, call him a friend. Don’t put a partner tag on them when they are not yet; it makes you feel pressured.
Wrapping Up
Starting fresh after a breakup might feel tiring and almost impossible. I’ve been there before, so I know that for sure.
Take your time, trust yourself, and don’t be afraid to embrace the journey ahead. You are not defined by your last breakup or your past mistakes, flaws, and flops.
You are not a failure. You only become one when you stop trying. So understand that you are deserving of something better.
You deserve to find a relationship that makes you feel loved and fulfilled.
