There are a lot of signs that a married man is only using you for his benefits alone.
If you’re reading this, you are probably in a relationship with a married man, and you definitely have your reasons for doing that.
Nevertheless, you can always tell by some signs that he is not reciprocating the energy you’re putting into making the relationship work.
There are a lot of signs that he is not only using you but also taking advantage of you.
And there may be one reason you’re still with him. It may be for various reasons, or you may have just had to grow fond of him over time.
Whatever the reason, there is a high chance that your relationship with a married man will never be definite and will only be temporary.
And this fact may battle your self-esteem.
However, a married man may be treating his mistress well according to his own definition of what constitutes treatment well.
Nevertheless, being treated well is not the same as giving you the value you deserve.
Do You Gain Any Value By Dating A Married Man?
Let me start by saying that dating a married man may not yield the correct value in the long run.
There is a huge difference between someone caring for you or paying you right and someone actually offering you the value that you’re worth.
However, this married man can offer you anything in terms of money, sex, material possessions, or whatever thing that you want.
But at the same time, I want you to be aware that all those may be temporal, and even if they happen, they won’t last for long. This is something you should know.
A married man may never leave his wife for you because whatever he gets from you, he may also get from his wife.
This shows that there are many probabilities that a married man is using you, but you may not even know in the long run.
I’ll be shortlisting a few signs to show you that a married man is using you for his benefit alone.
Signs That A Married Man Is Using You
1. He Doesn’t Care About You.
This is one of the major signs that a married man is using you, if all he does is to get something from you without caring about you personally then he doesn’t love you.
If a married man is dating you, then there are two things that are peculiar;
- You have something that his wife doesn’t have.
- Or, you offer him that particular thing in a better way than how his wife does.
Or, he just decides to be selfish and covetous by seeking pleasure from a mistress.
If a married man doesn’t care about you, he only uses you.
Caring about you involves stuff like
- Getting to know you better by being interested in your personal development and growth
- Being available for you whenever you need him.
- Asking about your personal life
- Take note of whatever you tell him
- Making you his priority
If the married man that you are dating doesn’t do any of these, then he doesn’t love you, and he is using you.
2. He Doesn’t Share Intimate Or Deep Details About His Life With You
This is another sign that a married man is only using you.
If you don’t know as much about his life as you ought to, he’s using you alone for the moment.
If the man truly loves you and wants to make a life commitment with you, he’ll be free to share some of his life events, experiences, moments, details, and everything else going on in his life.
When he doesn’t share certain things about his life with you, trust me, you’re only a means to an end, and he is definitely using you.
3. He Pays You To Be Silent.
Whenever a married man pays you to be silent about the relationship between you both, then he’s only using you.
If you’re so attached to him, you threaten to take the relationship to another level by letting his wife or family know.
If he showers you with cash or a physical gift, this is a way to pay for your silence.
Paying you is meant to keep you silent and away from his family, especially his wife.
If he does this, he has no plan to further the relationship between the both of you.
He also doesn’t want people around him to be aware; this is a great sign.
Mind you, if you always also accept his gifts and money so that you can remain silent, then this is a great sign that you’re using him as well.
And this becomes transactional.
This transaction implies that he doesn’t see you as a part of him but rather as someone with whom he can escape the responsibilities of his home.
Buying your silence with money only makes you an option to him.
This is one of the great signs you need to see that he’s using you.
4. He Doesn’t Bring Up The Issue Of Marriage
Truth be told, a large number of married men will never divorce their wives just to marry their mistress.
So don’t be surprised if the married man you’re dating doesn’t bring up the issue of marrying you one day.
Or whenever you try to bring it up, he always shuns you.
If a married man has no plan to leave his wife for you, then he’s using you.
He wants to spend the rest of his life with his wife and family, not you. I’m really sorry to break your heart.
Even if he tells you he might eventually marry you, it’s just a word on the tongue, and no action may be taken.
If the married man you’re dating doesn’t take a severe plan in seeing that you both get married, then he’s seriously using you.
5. He Only Discusses Sex Whenever He Meets With You
Most of the time, what a married man looks for in other women is sex…
If he only calls you when you both have to meet just to have sex, then trust me, he’s using you.
6. He Has Other Women Too
If a married man is dating you, then you are his mistress, and one sign to know that he’s only using you is if he has another mistress as well, apart from you.
If a man can leave his wife to pursue you by dating you, then he probably has another lady whom he pursues as well.
So, when you find out that you’re not the mistress in his life, it is evident that he’s only using you.
7. He doesn’t want you to get pregnant for him
If the married man you are currently dating doesn’t want you to get pregnant, then he doesn’t see any long-term commitment between you.
This is one great sign to know that he’s using you for sex alone.
If he consistently insists that you shouldn’t get pregnant for him by preventing pregnancy or he insists on abortion whenever you get pregnant for him, then trust me, he has zero life commitment plans for you.
What To Do When You See The Signs That A Married Man Is Using You
There is actually nothing else to do when you find out that a married man is using you than to flee from him.
When you find out about this, the first question you should ask yourself is: Can I offer him more value than his wife?
And you already know the answer.
If you can’t, he’ll never leave his wife for you.
So, the best thing to do is move forward with your life and build a relationship with someone who is worth your time.
If a married man is dating you and you agree to date him back, then you’re doing so because you want to get something from him, maybe money, material things, or anything else.
This allows you to discover that not only is he using you, but you’re also using him to achieve an end goal.
That is, both of you are using each other. Doesn’t that sound interesting?
Dating a married man is not only risky, but it puts the tag of a mistress on you as well.
It’s more difficult when you find out that a married man is using you to achieve a goal.
The intelligent thing to do is to leave to have the best life for yourself.
Signs A Married Man Is Sexually Attracted To You
10 Sure Fire Signs That You Are Not A Priority In Your Relationship
I believe that this is generalization, not very serious. Every case is different. Married men are not this kind of jerks, not all of them!,